By Cynthia Eckersley, Tribute Grant 2023 Recipient
Here is Part 2 of our 2023 Tribute Grant Award Recipient, Cynthia Eckersley's account of her Denver AGM experience told in 3 parts:
My rocky road to the Denver JASNA AGM was paved with good intentions. My husband offered to go with me to the JASNA 2023 AGM to support me in my adventure. We looked at the conference website, navigated through registration, and in June registered for a member and companion attendance.
The many options for extra activities along with multiple workshops were dazzling. The possibilities included side trips to the Rocky Mountains, Pikes Peak, and the Denver Art Museum. Workshops included Dancing English Country style or more sedate activities such as embroidery and bonnet making. While the numerous side trips seemed exciting, they all came with a price tag. Given that my husband and I had just spent almost $4,000.00 to travel in Quebec Provence for two weeks while practicing our French, I was reluctant to pay for extra events. We planned to rent a car instead of paying $350.00 to ride in a van with others. My husband also had a friend in Rocky Ford whom he wanted to see. Since there was no shuttle to the hotel, renting a car made sense.
We knew the weather could be dicey at that time of year (November) but given the El Nino predictions for winter, we thought we would take the chance. To economize, we would look on U-Tube for dancing lessons, or perhaps take advantage of a local dance troupe to learn ballroom steps. We had plenty of time to prepare as November seemed like a long way off from June.
On to the dress for the ball. What did those Regency gals wear? After studying 18th century clothing [https://fashion-era.com/fashion-history/regency/regency-fashion] and watching several versions of Pride and Prejudice, Sense and Sensibility and Emma I felt certain of what a Regency era dress looked like, but a ball gown? Could I make one? This was a little ambitious and perhaps out of my league as a sewer. I ordered a Regency era dress pattern from a historical sewing website I had used in the past [https://historicalsewing.com]. A Laughing Moon pattern for a Regency gown seemed doable with several versions. I cut out my first attempt from a sheet of Egyptian cotton that was off white, with a small pattern of lines running through it. It looked authentic. If I messed up, there would not be a huge cost involved. I used a king sized sheet to cut out the pattern. The advantage of using a king size sheet to cut out a pattern is that it is wide enough for multiple pieces to easily fit. My husband, trying to be helpful, bought me a Serger sewing machine with air threading for easier sewing.
Summer lumbered on. The sewing project seemed daunting, but I had plenty of time. I procrastinated sewing my gown and instead distracted myself by gardening and all the activities that summer gardening entailed (canning making applesauce, pruning flowers and picking tomatoes) as well as trying to stay in shape by walking, swimming and exercising.
Meanwhile, I looked at the many breakout and special sessions for the AGM. The many scholarly talks that were available ranged from a myriad of topics including marriage in Gretna Green, Music of the Mary Bennet variety, Divorce in the age of Austen, and so forth. How could one possibly choose? They all sounded fascinating. Recognizing a few names from the books I had read, I tried to narrow down my choices. Although the 2023 JASNA offered many workshops, sewing a Regency gown was not one of them. Also, I was disappointed that my husband was not eligible to attend any of the plenary sessions or workshops until the final morning. It confused both of us and was hard to believe since the companion fare was almost as much as the member fee. I emailed the director for clarification. As we processed the information together, my husband's frustration mounted. Mr. Darcy wasn’t too excited about dancing, as his hip pain made it difficult to navigate. His commitment to supporting me wavered with the realization that he was not going to be able to attend anything the entire weekend until Sunday! This truth was acknowledged, but it didn’t set well.
Also, my dress project was lagging. By October (a month before the AGM), I realized that I would need to either go to the ball in my nightgown or find something else to wear. I looked on Ebay and Amazon for a dress, but the cheesy polyester fabric of most of the gowns did not excite me as they were not historically accurate. Polyester and zippers did not exist during the Regency era. However, I took a chance on a Regency era red gown with gold trim that looked authentic and bid $60.00 on a handmade gown on Ebay. It matched a pair of velvet gloves with gold embellishment that a friend had given me for Christmas, and a shawl I had made from cutting up a velvet dress I no longer wore. My gold boots would work for shoes, as they were quite flexible and perfect for dancing. The dress came in the mail within a few days. After trying it on it needed to be altered. A typical Regency gown has ribbon trim on the bodice, which I could easily add. A trip to Josephine’s Dry Goods a few blocks from my house produced a beautiful antique trim to add to the bodice. The alterations required taking apart the inner seems to remove a dart, as well as hemming the entire dress by hand so that I wouldn’t trip when promenading, but all of this could be done easily. My ensemble was complete.
Meanwhile, My Mr. Darcy, was having more hip pain and his cough was worse, no matter how much cough syrup he drank. Thus, he was not feeling well, requiring a trip to the doctor where my husband made known that his pain was unbearable two days before we were supposed to leave! He informed me that he couldn’t possibly board an airplane or stay in a hotel for a week. Therefore, he would not be making the trip which shattered my self-confidence.
We had purchased trip insurance, but try as he might he could not get the rental car transferred to me, and the conference fee was non-refundable at such a late date. Our airfare had also been purchased months in advance with no flex option. It was too late to get a roommate, and purchasing tickets to any of the extra events was now out of the question. My Mr. Darcy wasn’t coming to the ball, and a meltdown ensued with tears, words of anguish, and lots and lots of Kleenex. Nothing I said could change his mind. It was either go alone, or stay home and be miserable. But I had committed to going to Denver and my region expected me to show up. They had faith in me. I had won the Tribute Grant and they elected me as Secretary. Although I was crushed and heartbroken that my husband couldn’t travel with me, I asked myself, what would Jane Austen have done?
The Austen family were frugal. It seems that they had little extra money. They sewed and planted and entertained themselves with music, literature, art and family games. Jane rarely went on dates and spent her entire life as a single woman. She had few opportunities to travel outside of her small social circle, and rarely alone. Perhaps she hired a carriage to go to London once she was a published author, but for most of her life she depended on family escorts to take her places.
I resolved to be like Jane. I had an incredible opportunity that I could not refuse. My husband drove me to the airport in silence. We parted with a hug and a kiss on the cheek with unspoken words laying like boulders between us. No words could express what I felt in my heart, that giant disappointment of feeling let down when I needed him most. The celebratory atmosphere of winning the Tribute Grant had been extinguished and while I understood that his pain made it physically difficult for him to travel, my own emotional pain and stress was off the charts.
I checked my luggage at the curb and walked into PDX airport with its iconic carpet, alone but determined to enjoy the JASNA Denver AGM.
My rocky road to the Denver JASNA AGM was paved with good intentions. My husband offered to go with me to the JASNA 2023 AGM to support me in my adventure. We looked at the conference website, navigated through registration, and in June registered for a member and companion attendance.
The many options for extra activities along with multiple workshops were dazzling. The possibilities included side trips to the Rocky Mountains, Pikes Peak, and the Denver Art Museum. Workshops included Dancing English Country style or more sedate activities such as embroidery and bonnet making. While the numerous side trips seemed exciting, they all came with a price tag. Given that my husband and I had just spent almost $4,000.00 to travel in Quebec Provence for two weeks while practicing our French, I was reluctant to pay for extra events. We planned to rent a car instead of paying $350.00 to ride in a van with others. My husband also had a friend in Rocky Ford whom he wanted to see. Since there was no shuttle to the hotel, renting a car made sense.
We knew the weather could be dicey at that time of year (November) but given the El Nino predictions for winter, we thought we would take the chance. To economize, we would look on U-Tube for dancing lessons, or perhaps take advantage of a local dance troupe to learn ballroom steps. We had plenty of time to prepare as November seemed like a long way off from June.
On to the dress for the ball. What did those Regency gals wear? After studying 18th century clothing [https://fashion-era.com/fashion-history/regency/regency-fashion] and watching several versions of Pride and Prejudice, Sense and Sensibility and Emma I felt certain of what a Regency era dress looked like, but a ball gown? Could I make one? This was a little ambitious and perhaps out of my league as a sewer. I ordered a Regency era dress pattern from a historical sewing website I had used in the past [https://historicalsewing.com]. A Laughing Moon pattern for a Regency gown seemed doable with several versions. I cut out my first attempt from a sheet of Egyptian cotton that was off white, with a small pattern of lines running through it. It looked authentic. If I messed up, there would not be a huge cost involved. I used a king sized sheet to cut out the pattern. The advantage of using a king size sheet to cut out a pattern is that it is wide enough for multiple pieces to easily fit. My husband, trying to be helpful, bought me a Serger sewing machine with air threading for easier sewing.
Summer lumbered on. The sewing project seemed daunting, but I had plenty of time. I procrastinated sewing my gown and instead distracted myself by gardening and all the activities that summer gardening entailed (canning making applesauce, pruning flowers and picking tomatoes) as well as trying to stay in shape by walking, swimming and exercising.
Meanwhile, I looked at the many breakout and special sessions for the AGM. The many scholarly talks that were available ranged from a myriad of topics including marriage in Gretna Green, Music of the Mary Bennet variety, Divorce in the age of Austen, and so forth. How could one possibly choose? They all sounded fascinating. Recognizing a few names from the books I had read, I tried to narrow down my choices. Although the 2023 JASNA offered many workshops, sewing a Regency gown was not one of them. Also, I was disappointed that my husband was not eligible to attend any of the plenary sessions or workshops until the final morning. It confused both of us and was hard to believe since the companion fare was almost as much as the member fee. I emailed the director for clarification. As we processed the information together, my husband's frustration mounted. Mr. Darcy wasn’t too excited about dancing, as his hip pain made it difficult to navigate. His commitment to supporting me wavered with the realization that he was not going to be able to attend anything the entire weekend until Sunday! This truth was acknowledged, but it didn’t set well.
Also, my dress project was lagging. By October (a month before the AGM), I realized that I would need to either go to the ball in my nightgown or find something else to wear. I looked on Ebay and Amazon for a dress, but the cheesy polyester fabric of most of the gowns did not excite me as they were not historically accurate. Polyester and zippers did not exist during the Regency era. However, I took a chance on a Regency era red gown with gold trim that looked authentic and bid $60.00 on a handmade gown on Ebay. It matched a pair of velvet gloves with gold embellishment that a friend had given me for Christmas, and a shawl I had made from cutting up a velvet dress I no longer wore. My gold boots would work for shoes, as they were quite flexible and perfect for dancing. The dress came in the mail within a few days. After trying it on it needed to be altered. A typical Regency gown has ribbon trim on the bodice, which I could easily add. A trip to Josephine’s Dry Goods a few blocks from my house produced a beautiful antique trim to add to the bodice. The alterations required taking apart the inner seems to remove a dart, as well as hemming the entire dress by hand so that I wouldn’t trip when promenading, but all of this could be done easily. My ensemble was complete.
Meanwhile, My Mr. Darcy, was having more hip pain and his cough was worse, no matter how much cough syrup he drank. Thus, he was not feeling well, requiring a trip to the doctor where my husband made known that his pain was unbearable two days before we were supposed to leave! He informed me that he couldn’t possibly board an airplane or stay in a hotel for a week. Therefore, he would not be making the trip which shattered my self-confidence.
We had purchased trip insurance, but try as he might he could not get the rental car transferred to me, and the conference fee was non-refundable at such a late date. Our airfare had also been purchased months in advance with no flex option. It was too late to get a roommate, and purchasing tickets to any of the extra events was now out of the question. My Mr. Darcy wasn’t coming to the ball, and a meltdown ensued with tears, words of anguish, and lots and lots of Kleenex. Nothing I said could change his mind. It was either go alone, or stay home and be miserable. But I had committed to going to Denver and my region expected me to show up. They had faith in me. I had won the Tribute Grant and they elected me as Secretary. Although I was crushed and heartbroken that my husband couldn’t travel with me, I asked myself, what would Jane Austen have done?
The Austen family were frugal. It seems that they had little extra money. They sewed and planted and entertained themselves with music, literature, art and family games. Jane rarely went on dates and spent her entire life as a single woman. She had few opportunities to travel outside of her small social circle, and rarely alone. Perhaps she hired a carriage to go to London once she was a published author, but for most of her life she depended on family escorts to take her places.
I resolved to be like Jane. I had an incredible opportunity that I could not refuse. My husband drove me to the airport in silence. We parted with a hug and a kiss on the cheek with unspoken words laying like boulders between us. No words could express what I felt in my heart, that giant disappointment of feeling let down when I needed him most. The celebratory atmosphere of winning the Tribute Grant had been extinguished and while I understood that his pain made it physically difficult for him to travel, my own emotional pain and stress was off the charts.
I checked my luggage at the curb and walked into PDX airport with its iconic carpet, alone but determined to enjoy the JASNA Denver AGM.